Elton John was right. 'Sorry' not only seems to be the hardest word to say, apparently it is the hardest word to say. Remember Jean Chretien's hee-haw a couple of weeks ago during Question Period over the HRDC scandal One billion tax dollars is spent in questionable ways and this is funny Lately, BC cabinet ministers Paul Ramsey and Joy MacPhail have laughed off a reporter's request for an apology over the half billion-dollar fast ferry mess.

It is time then to give these two politicians some help in the art of contrition. Below is a list of things the two BC cabinet ministers in question may wish to apologize for. Since 'sorry' is hard to say, all the politicians must do is check off the items for which they wish to apologize. Readers are invited to share this list with friends and family.

Dear Mr. Paul Ramsey / Ms. Joy MacPhail (circle one):

As a taxpayer and voter in BC, I request that you let me know which one of the following taxpayer sins you are sorry for. Please circle your name, check off the desired item, and send this back to me:s

"I, Paul Ramsey / Joy MacPhail (circle one), a minister of the Crown and guardian of taxpayer money, am sorry for:

Blowing $460 million on three fast ferries.

Not speaking up in caucus and canceling the fast ferry project in 1995, 1996, 1997, 1998, or 1999.

Future SkyTrain cost over-runs.

Glen Clark.

Lying to voters before the 1996 election about two "balanced" budgets.

Massive tax increases in the early 1990s.

Dave Stupich and his stealing-from-nuns routine.

Not compensating Nanaimo charities for Dave Stupich.

The ______ (write in year) budget deficit.

All past and future deficits.

Dale 'I'm-going-to-crush-a-free-speech-rally-in-Nanaimo" Lovick.

Glen Clark.

Ignoring a legal contract with Carrier Lumber which now may cost taxpayers $150 million in damages.

Limiting free speech through gag laws and wasting taxpayer money defending unconstitutional gag laws.

Joan Smallwood's use of taxpayer money to send partisan mailers.

Cost over-runs on the Island Highway.

Wasting $70 million in taxpayer money over the failed Vancouver Convention Centre project.

Wasting $400,000 - $152 per word - on a photo radar instruction manual.

Glen Clark.

Bailing out Skeena Cellulose for $300 million at the expense of both taxpayers and other mill jobs not in government ridings.

Doubling BC's debt from $17 billion in 1991 to $34.5 billion in 2000.

Jenny Kwan's London Vacation.

Spending $2 billion through Forest Renewal BC without a business plan.

29% pay increases for bureaucrats while running deficits.

Using BC Hydro as a cash cow to milk taxpayers for more money for government revenues.

Preventing union pensioners from collecting their pensions if they return to work for a non-union firm.

Glen Clark.

In addition to the above-checked apologies, I Paul Ramsey / Joy MacPhail offer you the taxpayer the following as additional evidence of my regrets:

Candy

Flowers

$115 for you and $115 for each member of your family to make up for what you lost because of the fast ferries.

All of the above.